Why You Can’t Just ‘Get Over’ Trauma: The Science Behind Healing

Have you ever been told to just “move on” or “get over it” after experiencing something traumatic? If so, you know it’s not that simple. Trauma isn’t just a bad memory we can choose to forget or a wound that time naturally heals. It’s a complex issue that affects both the mind and body in profound ways.

As a psychiatrist specializing in mental health education, I want to explain why trauma isn’t something you can just “get over” and why understanding the science behind it is essential for healing.

What Is Trauma?

Trauma is more than just a psychological event; it’s a biological response to something deeply distressing that overwhelms your ability to cope. It can result from a single, life-threatening event or from prolonged exposure to chronic stressors like abuse, neglect, or systemic oppression.

It’s important to note that trauma is subjective. What’s traumatic for one person may not be for another, depending on factors like personal history, support systems, and neurobiological resilience.

How Trauma Affects the Brain

When you experience trauma, several key areas of your brain are impacted:

1. The Amygdala: Often referred to as the brain’s “fear center,” it becomes hyperactive. This is why trauma survivors often feel anxious or on edge even when there’s no immediate danger.
2. The Hippocampus: Central to forming and retrieving memories, it can actually shrink in response to trauma. This affects how memories are stored and recalled, which is why people with trauma often experience fragmented, distorted, or intrusive memories of the event.
3. The Prefrontal Cortex: Responsible for rational thinking and decision-making, it shows reduced activity in trauma survivors. This makes it more difficult to regulate emotions, concentrate, or make decisions, especially in stressful situations.

Trauma and the Body

Trauma doesn’t just affect the mind—it profoundly impacts the body as well. When we experience trauma, our body’s natural “fight, flight, or freeze” response is activated. This results in the release of stress hormones like cortisol and adrenaline.

In trauma survivors, this stress response can become chronically activated, even when the immediate threat has passed. This leads to a range of physical symptoms, including muscle tension, chronic pain, digestive issues, and fatigue.

Why You Can’t Just ‘Get Over’ It

Given these complex changes in the brain and body, it’s clear why you can’t simply “get over” trauma. It’s not about willpower or forgetting; it’s about understanding, processing, and rewiring.

However, there’s hope. The concept of neuroplasticity—the brain’s ability to form new neural connections—means that with appropriate treatment, healing is possible.

Evidence-Based Therapies for Trauma

Several therapies have shown effectiveness in treating trauma:

1. Eye Movement Desensitization and Reprocessing (EMDR): This therapy helps rewire the brain’s response to traumatic memories by stimulating both sides of the brain, usually through guided eye movements.
2. Trauma-Focused Cognitive Behavioral Therapy (CBT): This helps you identify and change unhelpful thought patterns and behaviors associated with your trauma.
3. Somatic Therapies: These focus on releasing trauma stored in the body’s nervous system, helping to restore a sense of safety and physical self-awareness.

Mind-Body Approaches

Practices like mindfulness, yoga, and breathwork can also be beneficial. They help cultivate a sense of embodiment, reduce anxiety, and improve emotional regulation.

The Role of Self-Compassion

Self-compassion is crucial in trauma recovery. It involves recognizing that suffering is part of the human experience and treating yourself with the same care you would offer a loved one.

Conclusion

Healing from trauma is a complex process that requires a multi-dimensional approach. It’s not about “getting over it,” but about understanding, processing, and rewiring. With the right support and interventions, it is possible to move towards resilience and recovery.

Remember, if you’re struggling with trauma, you’re not alone, and it’s not your fault. Seeking professional help is a sign of strength, not weakness. Your journey to healing starts with understanding and compassion for yourself.